To Match or Not To Match – Is that the right question?

It is possible for people to be fulfilled, happy and prosperous, and to be connected to a partner, spouse, or kindred spirit with whom they can travel through this life.

The reality is that not all couples are a match for that kind of relationship.

However, it doesn’t mean that relationships that are not a match for that kind of lifelong relationship are necessarily “wrong” relationships. There is more than what meets the eye – in a physical sense. Mostly we make decisions from a limited array of ‘senses’ – sight, touch, smell, sound, taste. But there is a whole universe of senses that go beyond these physical senses.

Call it what you will – ‘the universe,’ ‘the Light,’ ‘God,’ ‘the Holy Spirit,’ etc. There is a force, a power that, when connected with, you and I are abundant in our abilities and acquisitions beyond what we could otherwise accomplish.

Unfortunately we are not always aware and connected to that force.

Fortunately we can always connect to it, at any point. It’s never too late. That force is never going to be gone and unavailable.

When it comes to couples matching, often times people come together with a particular set of needs, whether they’re cognizant of those needs or not, and pick a mate that fills those needs. Part of those needs could include a particular spiritual life lesson and growth, to move on to what is next in a spiritual sense. Once those needs are met, often times the relationship, you could say, is expired.

Commonly, people have already married or committed in common law “till death do us part.” So when there are problems between them they either fight to resolve them with no success, ignore them hoping one day they will just go away or give up and blame something – themselves, the other person or some external source – for the unviability of the relationship, which they say was the cause of the break up.

Unfortunately that kind of thinking doesn’t leave either person responsible for the fact that they picked that person, for whatever reasons they did.

In this type of mentality, people remain stuck in their limited view of themselves and life. The view that is only possible contained inside of the physical five senses we are most familiar with.

What can you do in this situation?

It is important to investigate the underlying purpose that brought the two of you together. For example, you may have a particular life lesson you need to learn with this person. And, until you learn that lesson you will keep having the same situations occur over and over, until you finally learn the lesson.

Once you’ve discovered the underlying purpose of your union, there are two ways you can explore this situation and determine what is next.

It may be that there are no further lessons to learn with this specific partner. It may be that your union has fulfilled its purpose and it is time to part ways, each one continuing separately on their journey with new discoveries and developments.

A second possibility is that the type of relationship you have been in is expired and it is now time for a new type of relationship, with your partner. That would mean “burying” the relationship – give your respective eulogies of appreciation for what the relationship gave you while it was alive, and send it on its way. Then, with a new opening in front of the two of you, create a new type of relationship with a purpose that you are both inspired by; Then, together step inside and live out the day to day creation and fulfillment of that relationship.

Either approach takes courage, confidence and trust. Both are simple. Neither is particularly easy. But, relationships are not about being ‘easy.’ Relationships are about giving you a place to grow and transform as the other person provides a mirror to reflect back on you what you need to see, in order to learn and grow.

I invite you to celebrate your relationship with this perspective in mind…